About nine months ago, I was sitting alone upon a floral bedspread in my mother’s bedroom at the summer home where we have been vacationing since I was a young child. I was looking out a paned glass window witnessing my giggling nieces and nephews playing in the clear blue water of Lake Okoboji in eastern Iowa. My computer sat upon my sunburnt thighs, while my body was experiencing a plethora of emotions; shock, fear, bliss and joy. My body was experiencing all these emotions because my eyes were looking down at a computer screen that was displaying my first-ever publishing contract to write a book.
I felt bliss and joy because for an undiscovered writer who works tirelessly for pennies to write, this contract was not only a validation that someone believed in my craft, but that now I may be able to do what I love with a bit more freedom. Simultaneously, I started to become acutely aware that my body was also frozen out of sheer terror. What I was reading was not only a bunch of legal jargon that I would have to ask my agent to clarify, but words that stated, “We wish to have your first draft by October.”
I thought to myself, “Did I read this right? October? That is in eleven weeks. Are they insane? Who can write a book in eleven weeks? Cracking Open took me seven years to write.” This shock took me back to remember how this all began.
The story goes a bit like this, one crisp fall afternoon I was in a meeting with a reputable publishing house at a high-rise in midtown Manhattan. The women were asking me about my previous book, Cracking Open, and my work as a therapist and public speaker. “What did you talk about in regards to trust?” one of them asked, referring to a concept I’d discussed at a conference.
“Intuition,” I said, “because I have always trusted my intuition.”
The women looked at each other and smiled. “Would you ever write a book for us on intuition?” another asked.
This was one of those life moments where time stops and you know your stars are aligned. I had a deep conviction that my career as an educator, writer, and therapist, along with the personal healing work I had done for years, had prepared me for this opportunity. And so I said yes. Or I should say I was a bit tongue-tied, so my agent said, “Molly would love to write a book on intuition.”
But as the slow moving publishing world often works, I left that meeting in November of 2015 and it was now July of 2016. It took nine months to actually have a contract and believe that I would have the support to write a book.
Coming back from my daydream, I did my best to get over my emotions, to walk out of the pine walled bedroom in order to celebrate this momentous occasion with my family.
Returning home to Bend, Oregon I found myself living in a cubicle at our local community college to write and write and write. While others were out frolicking in the sun, swimming, paddle boarding, or riding their bikes I sat in a chair looking at a computer screen typing away about a topic I am obsessed with because I know the value of its wisdom and the worth of its power. In between running my private therapy practice, and taking care of my family I interviewed amazing people and their stories around intuition, and then I would write and re-write and edit and re-edit the words upon the page.
I would sit and breathe and pray that God would give me one more sentence, thought, inspiration, vision and insight to type upon a screen in order to hopefully teach or touch one soul. I spent hours reading and researching on this elusive topic that is over looked, under-studied and undervalued for its wisdom, power and transformation to each and every person. I met beautiful souls who shared their stories around addiction, sexuality, abuse, around turning inward to silence, being an advocate for the earth, being a mother with a child who has a disability, while telling my own experiences, worries, anxieties, triumphs and growth through the lens and guide of intuition.
I loved every single second of it, sitting in an air-conditioned closed cubicle while others were in the sun. I loved typing, and thinking and writing all with the support of my guides, holding these stories in my heart in hopes of writing them in a way to express their fullest wisdom.
And then one day in October I finished, I had written a book in eleven weeks. I typed my last word; I edited my last page and pushed send on the email to my acquisitions editor that I was ready to be out in the world.
Now here I am in May nine months from the original date I received the publishing contract and I have birthed my book, Trust Within: Letting Intuition Lead. It is raw and honest, brave and insightful with the main message being whatever you do begin to wake up and listen to this gift we all have called our intuition. Learn to trust that small whisper you hear to change your life, stop your addiction, reach to heights you never knew were imaginable, forgive an enemy, love yourself, believe in the unbelievable because this wisdom in your body, nature, and psyche is guiding you to your truth.
Like any pregnancy, I was given a gift to birth a life. I know a book is not a human being, but it is alive with stories and insight. I was given a gift to be the voice to a message that will hopefully touch a heart or life.
The book does not come out until October 17th. Ironically this date is the day before my son Tommy’s birthday and two days before my father, Tom’s death date. It is one day before a birth and two days before a death. Is this a coincidence? I don’t think so.
Come with me on this journey, follow my blog, read my social media posts, which cause me so much angst to write, and trust within your own life to listen to your own intuition and then share your stories with me. And, of course, please, oh please buy my book on October 16th, read and pass on my book, Trust Within: Letting Intuition Lead to your friends and family. This is an unbelievable dream for a girl from Nebraska who never in her wildest dreams ever thought she would be writing a book, let alone one for others to read.